Did Someone Say... Poker?

Yesterday was the second annual Ride for the Future Poker Run. After some schedule changing and rearranging, DH and I were able to make the ride this year... and all I have to say is WOOHOO! What a ride!

Okay, I'll admit that the first word that came to mind was actually, "BRRRRrrrrr!" but that's not technically a word, is it? Regardless, it was cold enough during parts of the ride to make us wonder if we had lost our bananas for participating, but it was nothing three long-sleeved shirts and a leather jacket couldn't take the edge off of. Well, sorta. Barely. Okay, not really, but it was still a good time. And I'm sure DH will agree when and if the feeling ever returns from his frozen nether-regions, if you catch my drift.

I love poker runs because you know you are going to be surrounded by people who share at least one passion with you... riding motorcycles. Or is it wearing leather? Maybe both, but thats another blog post altogether, isn't it? Uhhhhh... never mind.

Aside from feeling like a sexy, leather-clad minx and having it be socially acceptable, the biggest upside of poker runs is knowing that all the while you are riding and having a good time, you are also helping to raise money for a good cause. Well, that and spending good quality time with DH, but that's just a bonus.

And let's not forget the great people you meet along the way, either. Take yesterday, for example: DH and I were done registering for the ride and were scoping out some seats for breakfast when we were invited to join a gentleman and his daughter at their table. Turns out it was going to be their first poker run and they were feeling a bit like outsiders looking in. They had a bunch of questions, and hot-diggity-dog, were we full of answers! Not really... but wouldn't that have been so cool? The reality is, yesterday was only our second poker run, but we had been lucky enough to be shown the ropes by some dear friends last year, so we paid the favor forward. And it was a great time getting to know our new friends throughout the day.

We also were lucky enough to win a few door prizes at the end of the ride meal, and actually came out ahead when all was said and done.

But, even if we hadn't won a thing... I still think we came out ahead.

A beautiful ride.

Time spent with each other.

And an excuse to wear leather... *wink*

Smooth Operator

By nature, I am accident prone. No matter what I'm doing, I can find a way to klutz it up. It's a gift, really.

I don't really remember being gifted in this manner until the fourth grade. That's when I somehow hit the jackpot and broke a toe while trying to do a cartwheel, and broke an arm while attempting to get onto a balance beam... all in one year. That takes talent, ladies and gentlemen.

After that it was rather common to hear the other kids say things like, "Smooth move, Ex-Lax!" Ahhh... don't children just have a magical way with words?

While many of my other talents from childhood have left me... like the ability to do math without a calculator... the ability to make a complete dork of myself has not only lingered, it's nearing perfection. I am so used to hearing people say, "What did you do NOW?!" that it doesn't even phase me anymore.

And it's not like I am a daredevil. I don't do 'daredevil'. It's the really complicated things, like walking and breathing at the same time, that give me the most trouble. I can fall off my shoes if I'm not paying enough attention. Seriously. And I had a bruise in the exact shape of Australia on my leg last year to prove it.

So far this year I have slammed two different fingers into two different drawers on two separate occasions within the same week. Both at work. And both in front of customers. There is nothing like trying to bite back all those words they didn't teach you in Sunday school ifyouknowwhatImean while Joe Public stands there helplessly watching. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure good ol' Joe is trying their best not to point and laugh while I hop around and mutter under my breath... I mean that's darn good entertainment right there. Anyway, it could be worse... at least I am only losing one fingernail and not two. Right?

What prompted this post was two things:

First, I fell off a step stool earlier this week, and fell back against a counter top where I proceeded to bruise and scratch a nice long stripe on my back. Did I mention I was at work when I did it? Again? And in front of a customer? Again? I'm sure the whole 'trying not to cry' thing was super-professional. I could just about teach a class on it by now. Anyhoo, I posted a status on my Facebook wall about the fall, where it inspired a slew of friends and former coworkers to walk down memory lane...

• Remember when you put the drill bit through your foot? That was so funny!


• OMG! You used to fall down the stairs so much! Remember we were gonna wrap it in those fun-noodle thingies and make you a bubble wrap suit?! And make you wear a crash helmet??! HAHAHAhahaha!


• You stapled your thumb to your math test back in junior high! I totally remember that!


• Dude... you fell down the stairs that one time after taking diet pills. Didn't you really hurt yourself then? Okay, not so funny after all. (blogger's note: yeah, not so funny... turned out after about 10 years of intermittent pain I had actually fractured my back and went undiagnosed... oops...)


• Didn't you do something to your foot when I worked with you? (Uh, yeah... thought I just stubbed my toe on a suitcase, but actually broke a bone in my foot)

Ahhhh... it's nice to know I leave people with such warm memories of me! I sure can make a lasting impression, can't I.

And, the second thing I did to prompt this post: I burned myself last night taking a pan out of the oven. I was using a hot-pad, mind you... I just missed it with my thumb. Have no fear: I did not drop dinner. A girl has to have her priorities, you know.

Someday, When I Grow Up

I'd like to think that one day I will grow up and not let snarky comments ruin my day. Someday soon... like maybe tomorrow.

I always thought grown ups were... oh, I don't know... more grown up or something. I always thought that I would eventually reach some sort of milestone and a magical switch would be flipped, and then all my insecurities would vanish. If there is such a thing, I am still waiting.

The funny thing is, the only reason people can ruin my day is that I let them ruin my day. I'm quite sure the person who was snotty, snarky, and downright bitchy with me today didn't even think twice about the comment that was made... but here I am, five hours later mind you, still hurt and upset. What, I ask you, is wrong with this picture? I sure can be an oversensitive ninny, can't I. Drama. Drama. Drama.

Sometimes I have flashbacks to elementary school... when I would eat my lunch at a table all by myself in the lunchroom, or would go sit on the far side of the playground and watch the other kids while they played during recess. I was the short, chubby girl that didn't fit in no matter how hard I tried. Inexplicably, even after all these years, it's days like this that I still feel like that lonesome little odd-girl-out.

Whew! All this... this... this drama from one, off-handed, mean remark?

Yep. It's definitely time for a chocolate intervention.

Thanks for listening... err... reading.

What-apotamus?

Back when DH and I were first living together, he had a habit of saying I was 'beautimous'. If I recall correctly, that was something the cool boys said to their girls back in the 80's. Yeah, that's cool... in a dorkishly outdated kind of way. (Isn't it?)

I don't know. To me it sounded way too much like 'hippopotamus'... and for some strange reason that just doesn't seem like much of a compliment, ya know?

In the interest of always being open and honest about things, I had of course kept my dislike of that term bottled up inside. That is until it burst out in a waterfall of emotion and protest one night when I was feeling a bit on the hippy side of the scale. Nothing like freaking him out during what was supposed to be a tender moment, eh? Just call me the Queen of Tact and Timing.

After DH got a good laugh at me for thinking he was likening me to a hippopotamus (and then apologizing for laughing me, I might add) we somehow coined what was the beginning of a never-ending string of nicknames for me...

When I am upset, DH says I am an emotia-potamus.

When I am tired... a sleepy-potamus.

When I trip and fall (or do something else extraordinarily graceful), he oh-so-lovingly refers to me as a klutz-apotamus. How... quaint.

Then there is dork-apotamus, bratty-potamus, grouch-apotamus...

Well, you get the picture. He can pretty much whip out an 'apotamus' name for whatever the situation may be. It's an art, really. And, for some unexplainable (and probably really dorky reason), I get all giggly and happy when he calls me his 'wife-apotamus'.

I know. I need therapy.

Yours truly,
Blog-apotamus

A Different Kind of Easter Hunt

Have you ever heard of Tony Hawk? You know... the world renowned skateboarding guru extraordinaire? If not then maybe you should. Today he did something truly remarkable, and my family (along with 364,000 or so other people) 'watched' as he and a handful of helpers pulled off an entirely different type of Easter hunt. Tony shipped autographed Tony Hawk skateboard decks all over the country (and even several internationally) and had his own version of Santa's Little Helpers hide them. Then he manned his twitter page all day today giving hints as to where the decks could be found. All he asked in return was for people to post pictures when the boards were located.

And it was... awesome.

Just watching the 'hunt' unfold on twitter today put a big ol' smile on my family's faces... and we aren't even boarders or skaters or anything. It was just the excitement that radiated off the pictures of those that were lucky enough to find the golden eggs... err... decks. It was contagious. And the mother who snatched one up for her son who is serving in Afghanistan? She brought me to tears. Yes, it's true... I had an emotional moment.

I hope others were as touched today as my family was. For us, it made us wonder what we could do here in Small Town that would invoke the same kind of excitement and good-natured fun that Tony was able to create on a much bigger scale today.

And for that kind of inspiration, I'd like to tell him thank you. Who knows... maybe I just did.

Easter... Bunny?

DD got her Easter surprise a day early: a new hamster. And, to commemorate the occasion for which she got it, the hamster is named... Bunny.

Already, the cutsie-ness of the name has gotten some mileage. Like when DD called DH and thanked him for the present. Mind you, I hadn't quite mentioned to him what I had planned... guess that would have been advisable.

Anyhoo, the call went a little bit like this:

*ring ring*

DH: Hello?

DD: Thank you for my Bunny!

DH: Huh? Uh... okay?

DD: Haha! It's not a bunny... it's a hamster named Bunny!

DH: Ohhhhh. Um. Well. You're welcome?

[insert lots of giggling and smiles here]

She got quite a kick out of confusing the daylights out of DH. He came home right after that to see this 'Bunny' for himself.

What I did not anticipate, however, is how fun it was going to be watching our dogs watch the hamster. We put the cage right on the floor so they could see Bunny running around in her wheel and climbing around in the tubes of the cage. We are pretty sure our middle dog, Rosie, thinks the hamster is a squeaker toy that moves all on it's own. Hot-DIGGITY-dog!

I don't think the other Easter bunny is going to be able to top this 'Easter Bunny'...

Let's Go Hunting...

This is my big brother. It's the only year that we weren't standing side-by-side for our Easter picture. And it's kind of sad, really, because that's how we always were at that age... side-by-side. He was my partner in crime. The Mutt to my Jeff. The Lone Ranger to my Tonto. The Donnie to my Marie. Well... I'm sure you get my point.

He was my brother and also my best friend. I didn't know it back then, but he was born with a number of birth defects that made him a very sick little boy. He was in and out of the hospital a lot. Maybe that attributed to how close we were growing up, I don't know... but we really were two peas in a pod. (You just thought I was done with the euphemisms...!)

Now, I'm proud to report, he is a strappingly healthy 40-year old man with beautiful wife and a 21-year old son in college. Sadly, we don't get to share holidays together anymore due to silly things like geography, job responsibilities and schedules.

And so, we don't get to hunt Easter eggs together anymore either. But then again, that's probably a good thing for me, because he was always way better at it than I was anyway.